平安夜。。圣诞节。。。

24/12/08- winter...Cold....

Went to 韩国小店----梦 for our dinner with Ting, Hui Jun, Jun, & Ziwen(Our junior)... We took cabs there.. before we ordered the food, we were busy taking pic using Ting's camera...after we ate finish, ting, ziwen and huijun went out to take a short walk.. only left me and Jun... so we just chat for a while... suddenly her tear came out... I was shocked.. but i also got the feeling of crying out...








Perhaps to me, this is my first time away from Home, away from my loved ones... is not that i not used to nanjing life, but i just feel so alone during this xmas... even though I have my friends here accompanying me.. but.. the feeling is different.. I was sad too..

When they came back, Jun was going to leave... she took cab home... @ around 11pm... We are not leaving, cos we wanna wait till 12am for xmas to come.. @ about 11.40pm, we ordered Drinks.... 酒。。

The only reason I will DRINK, is when I am quite down... sadded.. I know i shouldnt.. but.. Huijun helped me mixed both black and white one, cos this will be more easy to 醉.. The black one is only 5% alchocol, while the white one is abt 4% alchocol... I hope to be drunk, maybe not here... not now... I know I wont drunk, cos I am capable in drinking.. I think so.. cos I am well trained... haha..kidding...

I remembered the first time i start to DRINK is with my poly friends in a open pub.. I was so moodless, sadded that time, and i tried to drink abit each,like bloody hell, graveyard... cant remember... but i knew i drank the black beer more... the feeling was like the throat, stomach were burning.. but still ok for me..

But this time, I drank alot, this is my first time drank so much... 4 杯.. but i dont felt any burning.. just that wanna vomit.. cos ate too much during dinner and also drank a can of coke...too much gas in my stomach..felt that so full...




12 am.. is Merry Christmas.. We called Cher... at first Cher din ans the call.. thus they came up with an ideal to bluff Cher... so they kept callng Cher hp for several times, so that it seemed to be an ugent call.. then finally Cher answered..Ziwen told Cher that 3 of us Drunk.. asked him wat to do.. Cher asked Ziwen to call Markov for help.. haha.. or Jun.. but actually in the end, Ting or Huijun told CHer that we were just kidding... He actually was enjoying his Ktv with his friends @ Xu Zhou..

After that we continued chating.. drinking... But during that period of time, i was quiet.. thinking... feeling sad....so I composed a poem not poem... It says

平安夜里不平安
心里其实好想家
孤单的我好悲伤
难过度过圣诞节。。。

I sent this to Cher and Jun...

After my 2nd cup, i really cant take it anymore.. dont wanna take somemore.. cos really very full.. but bec HJ say something, cant remember.. is abt lier or bluff.. anyway this made me change my decision..So I took the 3rd cup over, and placed in front of me...

I rest for a while a drank it like drinking plain water... Before we left (at abt 1 am), we still left slightly more than half bottle of 青岛。。(3.5% Achocol)... Huijun wanna gives Ziwen drink.. then Ziwen drank 1/4 of it.. Ting was unhappy with it as she dont wanna Ziwen to drink anymore, so I took over and drank finished it..

I drank the most， 四杯 (2-Mixed, 2-White).. Ting only 一杯(White)。。 Ziwen 三杯(White)。。 Huijun 两杯(Black)。。

Am I really Sad.. Am I really Down.. thats y i drank? Hm.. i think that is a mixture of both sad and happy... but i really felt so alone... I missed my family, and friends, loved ones... missed till very badly... another reason is bec of friendship.. hm... recently.. sian.. moodless...

Ting said that this is just a 过渡期。。 I hope so...

@ abt 1 am plus reach home... Cher replied: 内心的平安才是永远。@有朋友，不孤独。。

I smiled.. and went to sleep...

I never sleep well since a month ago.. always sleepless night, or hard to fall asleep.. but Yesterday, I slept well in this cold winter.. Sweet dreammn.. and Sleep Tight...

25/12/08 --- Quite COLD..

Had dinner with Ting, LiXun, Jun and PJ.. again.. red wine... but is free... very small cup...very happy and enjoyed tonite dinner...



Wanna Thanks Jun (my first xmas gift), QiaoYun Jie (my 2nd Xmas gift) and Lixun(my 3rd Xmas gift)









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Will I changed oneday?

One of my friends become more and more less 公德心。。。 another friend said that must 入乡随俗。。 haha... how come.. cos that time we were eating Pop Corn.. I dont know wat to do with the seeds, while we were walking on the streets.. then my friend say throw on the floor la.. since everyone also doing that... she said eversince she came here, 她越来越没有公德心。。。 haha.. another friend said.. 入乡随俗.. Haha.. I kept laughing.. they are so funny...

however, my 良心 told me that I still cant be like them, i kept the seeds, till i found the rubbish bin then threw it away..

I will be addicted to DRINK... I will learn to Smoke...I will be addicted to GAMBLE.. and I will become... 没有公德心 or 入乡随俗...

No Way.. I wont... I have my own 原则。。

I will Drink, but I wont be addicted to it.. I will learn how to play Nanjing Majiong, but I wont played with money... But I will not smoke, no matter wat, even is a 应酬 from...

道德 will always remind me in my heart, and as for 入乡随俗... hm... Depends.. like 应酬。。 but i will never go against my principal... hopefully... I will keep on reminding myself...

All lesson will end by this week... Still left one test (next wed) and one exam (14/1/09)... weekend need to start study hard le... ["^U^"]
Jiayou en...